It is very uncommon for me to say that I have learned anything of value from drinking alcohol. Usually I fuck up in some way, or get to drunk and act the prat but very occasionally, in the stumbling fumbling rants that only a drunkard can muster, there is a spark of clarity and genius.
One of these moments is when I finally came to understand the phrase ‘ Is your cup half-full or half-empty?’. This phrase is usually used to judge the nature of a person – half-full being optimistic and half-empty being pessimistic.
During one drunken evening ( the details of which escape me), I attacked this phrase and the meaning behind it with alcohol infused wisdom.
I came to the conclusion that you always will have a half-full cup.
The alternative is impossible.
The Half-Full – If you have a cup that is only filled halfway then it is half-full. If you have a cup that was full and has then had half of its contents emptied then it is half of the fullness of the cup and so again is half-full.
The Half-Empty – If you have a cup that is filled half-way then it is half-full. You cannot refer to it as being half-empty as you have emptied nothing out of the cup. If you have a full cup and then empty half of its contents you still have a cup that is half-full because it is literally half of the fullness of the volume of the cup. If you had a half-empty cup it would be halve of empty.
You cannot halve EMPTY unless you want to spiral into quasi-physics and negatives.
So no matter your nature your cup is always half-full.
What does that say about your personality and your optimism and pessimism? Well….nothing. It doesn’t say a damned thing unless you want it to. You can come away with the view that since you cannot have anything half-empty then we are all secretly optimistic and those who claim the opposite are just kidding themselves.
This is of course quite an optimistic take on my drunken findings. You may well say my logic doesn’t address the real answer behind the phrase and the reasoning for pessimism being attributed to half-empty and you may well be right.
But I still have a half-full cup and, by admitting that, I ain’t trying to alter the physics of the Universe and probably end up breaking it.